Ariel Winter Is Single

Ariel Winter just got accepted to UCLA. She’s now single. I see a bright future ahead.

After speculation continued to surround Ariel Winter’s relationship status with Laurent Claude Gaudette, the Modern Family star finally decided to set the record straight on social media this weekend.

“Laurent Claude Gaudette” sounds like somebody who’d put a towel down even if you weren’t on your period, so there’s no way he knows what to do those titties. Some dude at UCLA might not either unless he’s near a dumpster. I’m sorry I said “titties”. Ariel Winter is an accomplished young woman pursuing her dreams through education while still doing the job she loves, but she also has huge titties. One doesn’t take away from the other. Ok, that’s not entirely true. This doesn’t make sense now. Titties makes sense. Let’s just focus on that.