‘Uber Fleas’ With World’s Biggest Penises To Invade UK

Closeup of mite and fleas infected on dog fur. Photo: santol (Getty)

That’s relative to size, mind you, but it still makes them sound more intimidating.

Yes, flea season is upon us. When temperatures rise, the numbers can be staggering, especially when these super fleas manage to survive a harsh winter. If you happen to be living in the United Kingdom, you’re about to find out the hard way (pun not intended until we remembered the hook).

Billions of these little buggers are set to invade the U.K. now that the recent hot and humid weather has provided ample breeding conditions. In order to keep them from infiltrating your home (especially if you have pets), there are a few simple guidelines to follow. Namely, keep pets away from areas frequented by flea-infested rodents, badgers, foxes or rabbits. From there, check them often, as well as your carpets and other soft furnishings and bedding. Female fleas produce up to 50 offspring each day, which live for several months. You don’t want to allow that mess into you home.

On top of those simple rules, Pets at Home store manager Ged Cranny offered his own insights on the matter.

The activity and behavior of fleas is often very much dependent on the climate.

As they thrive in a warm and humid environment, they’re likely to be present in greater numbers than usual during the next few weeks.

The population of fleas seems to have grown rapidly in recent years, but the risk of an infestation could be bigger than ever this summer.

Bottom line: Now is the time to be on guard the most. If you think it sounds like a lot of extra work, just think about how much more difficult eradicating something referred to as an “uber flea” from you home will be.

Finally, it’s worth noting these particular uber fleas are set apart by the males having members two and half times larger than their bodies. That equates to the largest penises on the planet in comparison to their stature. Of course, considering their flea-nises (patent pending) coil up inside their bodies, you don’t have to worry about bumping up against them. It’s the little victories (so to speak).