The chili con queso-hating writers at This Is Us accidentally waged a war against Crock Pot in January when they revealed the slow-cooking machine was responsible for Jack’s death. As if Mandy Moore’s grandma wig or Toby’s blazers weren’t ludicrous enough, the show posited faulty wiring in an old Crock Pot started the Pearson fire that ultimately led to Jack’s death. (He died from a heart attack caused by too much smoke inhalation.)
This Is Us fans metaphorically threw their Crock Pots off a bridge and went vegetarian shortly after this news came to light. Who cares if Crock Pot issued a statement saying its products were safe or replied back to dozens of fans on its social media channels trying to calm them down? Everyone knows the most reliable information about cooking appliances comes from fictional TV shows, so fans weren’t swayed by the company’s damage control. The chicken stew-scented damage was done.
But, praise be, Crock Pot and This Is Us came to a cease-fire a few days later. NBC released a “#CrockPotIsInnocent” ad during the Super Bowl to take the “heat” off the company and get people cooking chili again. And it worked: For the most part, people seem at ease with their Crock Pots, which, thank God. There’s no bond more special than a human and their slow-cooker.
But to doubly make sure their Crock Pots won’t go rogue and engulf their houses in flames, fans are now putting Jack decal stickers on them. Stickers with Jack’s face and messages like, “Don’t forget to unplug me!” are popping up on Amazon and Etsy, and people are actually putting them on their Crock Pots. Listen, if Rebecca eating a chocolate bar wide-eyed in the hospital doesn’t remind you to unplug your damn Crock Pots, then these stickers will surely do the trick. Here they are, in all their glory:
Thank you, Jack’s face, for teaching me all about cooking safety.
I wouldn’t know how to unplug my toaster if it weren’t for this exact decal.
The heart is a subtle reminder that Jack will still love me even if I burn my house to the ground.
I’ll think of this raised eyebrow every time I make pot roast.
It’ll haunt my dreams.
Crock Pots have never looked so weepy.