R. Kelly Admits to Everything (Well, Sorta) in New 19-Minute Song

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by Patrick Green

Photo: Scott Legato [Getty Images]

I admit it, when I see R. Kelly “trending” on my timelines, I immediately think he’s been locked up for the bevy of “alleged” sex abuse crimes of which he’s been accused of committing.

The #MeToo movement’s public enemy #1 has not only managed to stay clear (for now) of the law, but is releasing new music that declares his innocence. Kelly announced on Instagram a new, 19-minute song titled “I Admit” available on his Soundcloud page.

The song is in the vein of his epic urban opera, Trapped in a Closet, basically consisting of a long diatribe, where the accused sex cult leader admits to things. It’s off-putting to see a piece of art from a clearly troubled man, in which he seems to be playing the victim card. On the other hand, there are a bunch of made-for-meme lines, which you can see becoming fodder for continued roasting of Kelly on social media.

“I admit I fuck with all the ladies/That’s both older and young ladies/ But tell me how they call it ‘pedophile’ because of that shit/ That’s crazy

“I admit I can’t spell for shit / I admit that all I hear is hits / I admit I couldn’t read the teleprompter when the Grammys asked me to present.”

Won’t say no names I’m not a snitch / But one night at The Ritz / I did some shit I shouldn’t have did / Went and fucked my nigga’s bitch / I admit I admit that I did / I fucked my girlfriend’s best friend / Yeah I tapped that in the back of my Benz.”

 

Have at it, internet.

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