Dick pic. Photo: Björn Forenius (Getty)
Men — it’s never okay to send anyone, especially a lady, a picture of your member. It’s harassment. It’s gross. And it’s ridiculously juvenile. If you’ve ever done it (looking at you Brett Favre), you’re no doubt in need of misplaced affirmation, over-compensation for low self-esteem. Flashing your junk on camera and sending it unsolicited is wrong 100 percent of the time.
According to USA TODAY, a Missouri State sociology professor named Alicia Walker fired up a study this month analyzing how the size of a man’s penis affects all other aspects of his life. The study is based solely on two things: a questionnaire and dick pics.
“The kind of work I do is not for everybody,” she said.
Walker said the project looks at how penis size — and, as importantly, a man’s perception of his penis size — affects overall health, sexual activity, condom usage, self image, social interaction and mental health.
“So far I’m hearing a lot of anxiety and a lot of low self-esteem related to size,” she said.
Walker is asking for 3,600 men to fill out her online survey and upload several photos of their twig and berries. There are just a couple of stipulations:
- The “participants” must be at least 22-years-old
- They must follow the attached instructions when measuring their penis — flaccid vs. erect.
Walker ensured USA TODAY that these will not be “sexy pictures,” but “clinical pictures.” So how can you apply to participate in this revolutionary study? Walker’s contact info is on Missouri State’s website.
Walker — with the help of a student — is also soliciting men through an online portal, at hospitals and at nightclubs. It appears she wants to see the full spectrum of the male homo sapian.
The study is expected to wrap up this summer. Missouri State confirmed its legitimacy and that Walker was approved by the Institutional Review Board, falling in line with all their standards to conclude the study legitimate.
Fellas, if you’ve ever wanted the sophomoric thrill of sending a dickk pic to someone (and feeling guilt-free about it), now is your chance.